[成為顧客的親密戰友]
余澹富說：
為了客戶的最大福祉著想，
為了「尊敬客戶、愛護客戶」這種專業精神，
成功的心理學家就需要和顧客做朋友，
提供心理學大師的所謂「無條件的愛」unconditional love！
Love bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
( 1 Corinthians 13:7 )
余澹富又強調：
儒家的「唯仁人，能愛人，能惡人。」《大學》
及「惟仁者，能好人，能惡人。」《論語》
比起西方人提出的「無條件的愛」，始於低了幾個層次！
余澹富當然知道一般思考能力不足的人，
一般喜歡不勞而獲，喜歡聽悅耳說話的人，絕對不會明白：
「只有某些願意為自己的遺傳基因承擔責任的父母，
才會對自己的子女有無條件的關愛！
西方人提出的無條件的愛，是跡近行騙的幻想！」
為了增強大貪官對專家的信心，我再補充了一句：
Those people are insignificant others
and I am your significant other,
at least at this moment.
當世人都疏遠了你，我會站在你的身邊，
當敵人都在攻擊你，我會做你的擋箭牌，
在心靈上默默地支持你。
我是你值得信賴、可以推心置腹的朋友。
Some people won’t love you,
no matter what you do.
Some people won’t stop loving you,
no matter what you do.
Don’t dwell on those who let you down,
cherish those who hold you up！
Be with people who truly value you.
If I have to choose between
being kind and being right,
I certainly choose being kind because
they say I will always be right if
I make that choice.
My soul honours you soul.
I honour the place in you
where the entire universe resides.
We are united, we are the same, we are one.
But you must never forget
who was there for you when nobody else was.
A true friend is someone who believes in you
and lets you have total freedom to be yourself.
That’s what real love amounts to──
letting a person be what he really is.
( Jim Morrison )
劉德華在《志雲飯局》對朋友下過這樣的定義：
「朋友係，唔理你做得啱唔啱，總之撐咗你先。」
於是衍生出下列的邏輯推理：
你強姦，我撐你；你將人暴打，我撐你；
甚至你殺了人，我都撐你，相信被殺者罪有應得；
因為我們是朋友，可能更因為我都是這樣的人。
一個「成功」的心理學家當然必須支持他的顧客！
所以那些不願意在你逆境之中和你並肩作戰的人，
不應該再是你的朋友！
If people can’t accept you for who you are,
then they are not your friends anymore.
Just delete them！
When someone negatively affects your life,
run away from him as fast as possible.
Negative people inevitably hurt others
with their words or actions.
They are great destroyers of
self confidence and self esteem.
Remove all the wrong and negative people
out of your life and you will find out
how peaceful life becomes.
余澹富明白音樂的力量，完全不怕肉麻，
所以說完了之後就立即播放一首歌給大貪官聽：
Diana Krall《Just The Way You Are》
大貪官聽了之後，感動到淚流滿面，
用雙手緊握著我的左手，覺得我簡直是他的再生父母。
我繼續向他指出：
人的尊嚴必須建立在自信之上。
Don’t underestimate yourself
by comparing yourself with others.
It’s our differences
that make us unique and beautiful.
Keep your dignity.
Tell yourself that you are on a
much higher level than they are.
Don’t let people make you feel bad or guilty
for living the life you want.
It is your life. Live it the way you want.
Moreover, you are being kind to these people
because you have God and the Truth
on your side and you still let them have
the extravagance of thinking that they are right.
You are the world！
You are the youniverse！
余澹富說：
每個人都需要別人的鼓勵和同情，
愚昧的人絕對沒有能力分辨甚麼是鼓勵和同情，
甚麼是拍馬屁，甚麼是落井下石兼拍馬屁。
例如鼓勵一位懶惰、不求上進的人對自己說：
I love and accept myself unconditionally.
I love myself just the way I am.
I treat other people in just the way I want.
I define my own success and happiness.
I commit 100% to the things that make me happy.
I have all my hobbies and readings directed
toward my dreams.
I learn how to think out of the box.
I always act quickly, never wait till tomorrow
for what I can do today.
I always put “the important” before “the urgent”.
I forgo the good to pursue the best.
I am grateful for what I already have but
I also strive to better myself.
既可以是同情，亦可以是落井下石兼拍馬屁。
由於這是高深的拍馬屁和心理輔導技巧，
我當然不會告訴他「人的自信應該如何建立」。
我相信一般人都不會懂得問這個問題。
[親疏有別、同舟共濟]
余澹富說：
一個人如果要做大事，
都需要找到合作伙伴同心同德，同舟共濟，
做任何大壞事，更加千萬不要忘記：獨食難肥！
所以一定要培植一班同道中人互相扶持，大家一起去貪。
貪污，最緊要「齊心」，
有一班自己友「齊心」貪污，貪污才可以「大躍進」！
治詩和舞涼心的人有福了，因為地國是他們的！
天國，就讓別人去擁有罷。
Beautiful things happen
when you distance yourself from
those mean and disrespectful people,
busy loving those healthy people who love you,
and surround yourself with those who
appreciate you exactly as you truly are,
who believe in you and your dreams,
who see greatness within you,
and who bring out the best in you！
這才是有深度的「親疏有別」，
是 EQ 高的人的「親疏有別」。
有了同道中人，才可以同心協力、同仇敵愾！
近朱者赤，近墨者黑；
物以類聚，人亦以類聚，道不同不相為謀，
這是十分有道理的。
Wit is a dangerous weapon, even to the possessor,
if he knows not how to use it discreetly.
( Michel de Montaigne )